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mentaires.info President Mubarak Blames Egypt’s Chaos on American Tea Party
by Joel Niedlebaum, DP Middle East Liaison
Monday, January 31st, 2011
(CAIRO) —In what could be one of his last statements as President of Egypt, and perhaps even on Earth, a teetering Hosni Mubarak publically laid blame for the current upheaval in his country on the United States’ Tea Party movement.
In a statement released to Al-Jazeera television Sunday, the embattled leader charged American Tea Party members with inspiring Egypt’s pro-democracy demonstrations that have raged for days and brought life in the ancient nation to a virtual halt. The Tea Party, credited
with the GOP’s retake of the House of Representatives and reenergizing support for constitution-based conservatism, are playing a direct role in the newest attempt to oust him, Mubarak said.
“Just look around us,” read Mubarak’s statement, “ruling parties being overthrown; people heckling their leaders, representatives being shot; crosshairs on maps…this is where the hooligans in our streets are taking their cues from –Michelle Bachmann, Malkin, Palin, Glenn Beck...There’s nothing to blame for (Egypt’s) current strife except the tea partiers!”
“I’ve been the greatest leader in Egypt’s history,” continued Mubarak. “The fact that any of my countrymen could raise
a hand against my benign rule is proof of how malignant the influence of the American Tea Party movement has become. They must be stopped!”
According to sources, Mubarak called President Obama over the weekend, urging him to clamp down on tea partiers, before they inspire people to topple any more ruthless dictators.
Added Mubarak, “I guess Nancy Pelosi wasn’t enough for these fiends. They had to inspire other nations to overthrow their governments, too! The U.S. is at fault for allowing this anti-government fervor to take hold and infect the rest of the world.”
Such allegations have besotted Middle East experts and spectators with both shock and admiration. Many hail Mubarak’s blaming a totally unrelated political force on the other side of the world as his best bet at assuaging the rage now gripping Egypt and threatening his reign.
Mubarak’s blaming the Tea Party for his country’s current crisis is not only effective, but “truer than hell,” according to former Secretary of State Madeline Albright. Appearing on a special edition of NPR’s Diane Rehm Show Sunday, Albright said that no nation’s internal conflicts could any longer be viewed as not influenced, or even directly orchestrated, by the American Tea Party.
“Mubarak is right to call out those working for violent revolution in the U.S.,” said a somber Albright. “When a country as revered internationally as the United States has such a strong, anarchistic movement like the Tea Party, other nations will naturally take inspiration from that, and blood-spattered chaos will inevitably ensue.”
“I think those tanks in the streets of Cairo are being deployed a few thousand miles away from where they really should be,” added Albright. “They should be moved about 6000 miles east, to the streets of Virginia, Alaska, Ohio, Michigan, in front of Michelle Bachmann and Palin’s house. That’s where we need those tanks…You can’t expect other nations to have peace in their streets unless we can stop the bloody rampaging in our own.”
CNN’s Fareed Zakaria dedicated his Sunday broadcast of Fareed Zakaria GPS solely to the pro-democracy demonstrators in Egypt and their connection to violent, anti-government gangs of shriveled, 75-year-old chain-smoking grandmothers in the U.S.
Said Zakaria, “You can see in the way these protesters have defaced images of Mubarak and gotten creative with their signs that they’re clearly under the influence of Tea Partiers. Some have even put Hitler mustaches on portraits of Mubarak.”
Evidence of Tea Party inspiration abounds in Egypt, according to Zakaria. Viewing a live shot from atop the Hilton hotel in downtown Cairo, Zakaria pointed out, “Look, you can see a man on the corner of the street there smoking a cigarette. Now, who also believes in the right to smoke…? American tea partiers, that’s right!”
Tainted Tea: Connection to U.S. Tea Partiers May Be a Double-Edge Sword
President Mubarak’s Tea Party inspiration charge may have already put cracks of doubt in pro-democracy organizers and saved his regime. Georgetown University Mid-East Studies professor Ewing von Plaupf, Ph.D., believes the Mubarak regime has passed its most vulnerable moments, now that unruly Egyptians can shift their rage at the true source of all earthly woes –Tea Partiers.
“One would be a fool not to see how the U.S.’s recent breakout in war-like rhetoric is influencing these protests in Egypt,” said von Plaupf to Duh Progressive Monday. “But if these rioters in Egypt can see that their movement’s leaders are simply mimicking something as repulsive, as insidious as the Tea Parties, they’ll respect (Mubarak’s) curfews, stop looting, and open the table to new, constructive dialogue with the regime.”
Mubarak’s charge may already be having an effect on demonstrators. Mahmud Zaiad, a 24-year-old democracy supporter from the Cairo’s El Bhar neighborhood, said he never considered he and fellow demonstrators to be anything like American Tea Party members, but if true, he would dispense with his marching and yelling at once.
“If what we’re doing here is anything like what those people are doing in the States, I’ll stop immediately and support Mubarak,” said Zaiad. “I’ll do anything… ANYTHING not to be equated with those bunch of jackbooted terrorists.”
But equating internal political strife to Michelle Bachmann and Sarah Palin must be done carefully, according to Professor von Plaupf. If leveling charges of Tea Party connections are made arbitrarily, political debate, let alone change, may end all over the world.
“I’ve lived in and studied the Middle East for forty years now,” said von Plaupf, “there’s still a great deal of corruption and oppression in those nations…Although Mubarak was right this time to call out these protestors’ links to Tea Partiers, too many unfounded accusations like that may shame political dissenters in other countries never to speak up again. Just imagine if Lenin or Pol Pot had been too scared to be associated with the Tea Party —where would we be today if they hadn’t taken a stand and graced the world with their beautiful, enduring achievements?”
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